1. I made the mistake of drinking something while looking at this. I now blame/thank you for a desk covered in water.

  2. Just subtle enough to avoid the kind of controversy Alex Ross caused with Mister Atom or Doc Cock or whoever that shiny guy with the package was.

  3. The eyebrows make it look like there’s an intense effort going into the ole Crotch-Pop there. Looks painful.

  4. Usually the fetish is to take a picture with a camera of somebody cumming…not a picture of somebody cumming a camera.


  5. Ah, for the days when Spider-Man looked like a sleepy longshoreman.

  6. Obviously, Peter was tired of every one bugging him with “Pics or it didn’t happen” when he explained that he was sleeping with a model.

    He found a solution I think that works not only in the bed room, but is great at parties.

  7. So it wasn’t radiation that killed MJ, after all, but the subtle and unnoticed build-up of cameras until it was too late.

  8. I actually have that ASM run, and while it always struck me as being weird / off putting, I could never figure out why. Now I know. Thanks, Chris Sims!

  9. I think Beatnik Spider-Man would make a great comic.

    Drinking with Kerouac, laying out wisecracking yet ‘deep’ poetry…. and occasionally beating the hell out of Suburban Practice Doctor Octopus.

  10. uhhh… because he’s wearing all-black clothing…. is my point. i guess i neglected to mention that.

  11. That sound effect makes it seem like Ambush Bug just appeared in Pete’s crotch.

  12. im just gonna roll with those jokes, they film me with laughter. im doubled over.

  13. the speed with which we seem to be coming up with these makes me shutter. it’s winding me up so much, i need to go sit in a dark room.

  14. Really? His crotch opens up and nobody puns about him exposing himself? Exposure is one thing, but… punny.

    On a different note, I can appreciate the ability of the symbiote to stop bullets, even when it appears to be skin tight. After all, they’re working on several smart fabrics that instantly become extremely hard and durable when something like a bullet strikes them. However, if you’re using it for storage like that, would it not leave an unsightly bulge? Not like the tentacles weren’t creepy enough already.

  15. There was an excellent question in the letter columns of the time about whether the extradimensional pocket (think TARDIS, also think “thing that Venom has never given any evidence of possessing”) could keep hot drinks hot and cool drinks cool and, if so, whether Pete shouldn’t always carry a six-pack around for a post-teamup cold one. I’ve always taken that as evidence that letters columns were inherently superior to the comics internet.