9 thoughts on “BATMAN

  1. If Boxing Dave can go toe-to-toe with Santa, he’d easily take Batman in a straight boxing match (Santa is strong enough to lift a sack full of presents for almost every vaguely christian child in the world… that’s gotta put him way out of street league even if it is a magic sack). Of course Bat’s would know that and would think of some other way to beat Boxing Dave (and he’d have some kind of contingency plan for taking big red down if he had to too no doubt). Both fights are fights Id like to see. I will ask for this next year.

  2. In a regulation boxing match with Santa I think Batman would have a tough time, but would ultimately come out victorious. While Santa is both strong(as mentioned above with the comment about the weight of the bag of holding he carries with him) and fast(not only can he travel the world in one night, he also is known to be “lively and quick”) it would be against Queensbury Rules to use magic in the fight. At least I think it would. The Queensbury Rules are, oddly, vague on the topic of teleportation. Batman would also be utility belt free and would not be able to activate any contingency plan unless worse came to worse and Santa went on a killing spree for some reason(any reasons for Santa losing his mind in this manner are improbable in the DC universe as far as I know it, though it may change if Weird Al writes a song about Batman, thus allowing “The Night Santa Went Crazy” to be a viable cross-over) Regardless, Santa would find himself fighting a man that he knows very well is on the “Nice” list (a secret identity is of no use to Santa, and leaving up separate stockings for “Green Arrow” and “Ollie” are met with large lumps of coal and a note along the lines of “You really should know better.”(Lumps of coal are never left for Superman, not because he is always good, but because if he is naughty he’d been planning all along on crushing the coal to make it diamonds.))and has been so for many years(despite many attempts by immortals and female cat burglars and psychotic clowns to make him join the ranks of the “Naughty”) meaning that Santa would throw the fight. This act would not only be a victory for Batman, but would count as the Christmas Gift for millions of Fanboys, saving Santa quite a bit in toys. Clearly the only reason this fight has not occurred is that too many of us are naughty. We must all be good, not for goodness sake, but for the sake of seeing a sanctioned Boxing match between Batman and Santa.
    Uh… I think I’ve thought about this too much and my time would arguably be better spent sleeping than leaving rambling comments on comics blogs.

  3. Artie Simek is just like Boxing Day– he only comes once a year, and, usually, in Canada.

  4. As I remember it, the scene with Batman and Wildcat are forced to box each other to the death happened in every panel of every issue of the Brave and Bold.

  5. thebluesader, any fight where the sound of two simultaneous clouts to the jaw is that of a large group of determined lady physicians is a very good fight indeed.

  6. Beyoncé Knowles, in the time it took you to find and post that joke, the real Beyoncé Knowles made approximately $180,000 in royalties before making sweet love to that guy she married. I, based only on my replies to comics blogs, also made $180,000, and okay, that’s Canadian, but still.