Wrestler Wisdom Fridays #9

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Each week, the ISB endeavors to enlighten our readers by offering the unedited words of the Warrior Scholars of the squared circle, for who among us cannot benefit from the wisdom of Macho Madness, Hulkamania, or the American Dream? The instruction we offer should be considered carefully, meditated on, and applied to one’s own life for the enrichment of the self and others.

9 thoughts on “Wrestler Wisdom Fridays #9”

  1. Wow – Austin 3:16 was a thing that happened and that my brain wiped from its memory. I can still remember Cannonball’s name, but I forgot about the WWF’s subversive blasphemy.

  2. Well, other things have verse and line numbers beside the bible, you know. Like epic poetry for instance. And really, isn’t that what the WWE (ne F) is? In a motion sense.

  3. I like how he’s so specific about what will stop him. Sure, guts and talent – in a wrestling sense – will do just fine. But barring that, the only other option is a MACHINE GUN.

    What if you have guts but no talent, but a handgun? Or you have talent, but instead of guts, you have some kind of military knife? Do any of those combinations work?

    Wrestling math is hard.

  4. Other things have verse and line numbers, yes, but the origin of Austin 3:16 is from his promo on Jake Roberts following the aforementioned King of the Ring match. Roberts was working a “born again, cleaned up his life” gimmick (which sadly was just that), and after beating him Austin said (and I take this from Wikipedia because I don’t have it memorized):

    “You sit there and you thump your Bible, and you say your prayers, and it didn’t get you anywhere! Talk about your Psalms, talk about John 3:16… Austin 3:16 says I just whooped your ass!”

  6. Stunning Stone Cold Steve is far and away my all time favorite wife beater when he actually bothered to show up.

  7. “You sit there and you thump your Bible, and you say your prayers, and it didn’t get you anywhere! Talk about your Psalms, talk about John 3:16… Austin 3:16 says I just whooped your ass!”

    …and THAAT’s the bottom line ’cause STONE COLD SAID SO!