Nuclear Pianos and Rubber Ears: The 1990 Captain America Movie

 

 

As you may have heard, there’s a Captain America movie coming out later this year, and in what might be the most inexplicable promotional move ever, Disney is planning to hype that up by releasing a director’s cut of Cap’s last cinematic effort, a 1990 film starring Matt Salinger that was shelved for two years before being released to VHS.

You can probably see where this is going.

Yes, that’s right: Once again it has fallen to me to review a piece of cinema obsucra, and in the grand tradition of Marmaduke and Jonah Hex, I take on Captain America for ComicsAlliance, running down 96 minutes of nonsense for your reading pleasure.

7 thoughts on “Nuclear Pianos and Rubber Ears: The 1990 Captain America Movie

  1. I saw the Reb Brown version, which is bad but not hilariously bad.

    You summary makes the 1990 version sound hilariously bad, but I suspect 60-80% of the hilarity is due to the Chris Sims filter.

  2. I think I have the comic adaptation of this; I had no idea it was ever released as an actual movie.

  3. I love the 1990s Captain America movie unashamedly. It just jumps right in there and does what it can with the talent and budget it had available, but like most Albert Pyun movies it does suffer from a slight case of incomprehensibility.
    And Ronnie Cox says “Gee whizz!”
    And gives Cap the thumbs up.

    Love it.

  4. Internet People are complaining about the costume from the 2011 film but we already had the ‘correct’ costume, in this film, and it’s simply atrocious. But at least it’s better than David E Kelley’s Wonder Woman with sky blue spandex pants and a cheap halloween corset.

    What puzzles me the most about this re-release is the whole Tron debacle. Disney won’t release Tron on DVD/Blu-Ray, a movie people actually love and revere, before the high-cost update/sequel. But they’ll give this…thing a release, which was so awful they refused to show it in theaters.

  5. It’s almost as if Disney doesn’t want a Paramount release to succeed…

    Yes, it seems like they’re betting that The Avengers movie, to be released by Disney, will rehab the character.

  6. Did anyone else see in the trailer for the new film when Cap and a bunch of presumably Howling Commandos are breaking into some Hydra compound. I was like “DUM DUM DUGAN!” Was that Dum Dum? Does anyone else think, finally, a summer tentpole film with 100% Dugan?