Slow News Day
July 30, 2007 | Posted by Chris Sims Your Spidey Super Stories Moment of Joy for this week:
More on J. Jonah Jameson’s dubious journalistic integrity can be found in Spidey Super Stories #56, wherein Mary Jane dresses up like Spider-Woman and the Green Goblin steals everyone’s candy.
Categories: J. Jonah Jameson, Spidey Super Stories | 
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20 Comments »
Quick! Before it melts!
They really need to collect these treasures in TPB form. :-)
I’m not even going to ask for context on this.
It would just ruin the pure beauty.
It’s snowing. Jonah wants pictures. This is, I assure you, the complete and total context.
It wasn’t like July or something and snowing?
I just can’t wrap my mind around it all.
OK, that is so totally a spur-of-the-moment excuse. “I NEED you!!…to, um, go take pictures. Yes, of snow. Don’t argue, just bring them back to my office immediately, OK?”
Chris, you’ll be happy to know that I hunted through dozens of booths at Comic-Con until I found a copy of the “Super Stories” with Thanos and his nifty helicopter. I had no idea the Mad Titan liked to rhyme so much.
I presumed JJJ meant the white rapper of “Informer” fame
So there’s where Hitler was hiding. The Reed Richards’ wig had fooled me.
I actually believe that Jonah’s demand for snow pictures is sincere and necessary. As Midwesterners (Michigan, to be exact), we’re always bemused when national media lead their newscasts with “Hey, look, it snowed a lot in the East!” Meanwhile, Midwestern blizzards are ignored, I guess on the theory that it’s supposed to snow there, or more likely, anything that happens on the east coast is more important than the exact thing happening elsewhere.
And that’s why JJJ is a “bad guy”…it’s always about HIS needs.
…and the Green Goblin steals everyone’s candy.
The rat bastard!
Well, clearly the Goblin MADE it snow as a part of his master candy-stealing scheme. This would be Step 2b: “Distract the news media.” He’s got it all worked out. Step 8 is “Get MJ to dress like Spider-Woman (optional)”.
Until finally we get to Step 47, “Steal everyone’s candy” and Step 49, “PROFIT!!!1!!”
Wow. I so need to find every single one of these things. Immediately.
Wait. You’re telling me there’s a “mid” west?
That’s just crazy. Next you’ll be trying to tell me there’s a “New” Mexico or a strange, magical land where they put syrup on bacon.
are there pictures of this MJ Spider-Woman gloriousness???
JJJ’s having a very Shatneresque moment.
The third word balloon looks like a strong contestant for the next comic meme:
I need you…
a) as only a man can!
b) like a gorilla needs a tank!
c) for special fun times!
d) all of the above
And I want them finished before you start and before you finish get me some coffee. And they should have the following rhyme schemes….
“Brock peed in it!“
“Well Jonah, we have this new photographer named Byrne who can get you a good snowscape.”
“Funny, it looks like a blank piece of paper.”