38 thoughts on “Come Back Here You Creep!

  1. This is going to make me sound like a particularly nerdly person, but only two thoughts came to mind looking at those panels:

    1. The lettering is sublime.
    2. And it reminds me of the lettering font used on the All-New Atom and Morrison’s run on New X-Men.

    Might I ask who’s credited as letterer (or, in simplified Spidey Super Stories parlance, “The nice man who writes the words in the bubbles”)? It’s a weird technical fascination for me.

  2. good thing Kang took the time to check his outfit before he left home. if he would have gone out WITHOUT the magenta thigh high boots he would have looked just plain silly.

  3. The Marvel Universe needs more Kang. He could go back in time and get Wanda some anti-psychotic meds. Explain to Tony how supporting the Registration Act or shooting Hulk into space may come back to bite him in the metal ass…

    Or just go back, find the teen-age Brian Micheal Bendis and slap him around until he understands that making Elektra a Skrull is really FUCKING stupid…

  4. Or just go back, find the teen-age Brian Micheal Bendis and slap him around until he understands that making Elektra a Skrull is really FUCKING stupid…

    How is that, in and of itself, stupid?

  5. In Kang’s future the lemonade is free for everyone, how could he know what problems would arise by taking a pitcher of it. This is clearly an example of Parker’s eurocentric thinking leading him to apply his patriarchal oppression on someone of a liberated post imperial culture. Peter Parker is a tool of the man.

  6. I’m surprised Kang didn’t think of the changes to the time stream taking that lemonade does. That little girl runs into the street after Kang, gets hit by a car and Hitler takes over the world. Oh wait that was Star Trek.

  7. Oh and to the guy blaming Bendis for Marvel’s mistakes. Yes he is thier only writer and they have no editorial direction or meetings about these things or anything like that. Just Bendis.

  8. Why do I feel like this comic will end with Spidey making Kang go away by bringing him delicious Hostess Fruit Pies?

  9. Her lemonade stand has wheels and a shade umbrella? Just how far does a dime go in Spidey Super Stories economics, anyhow?

  10. You know I would think taking over America would make me hungry rather than just thirsty. I guess I just have higher standards than the Kangster.

  11. Great Bananna
    I apologize for my anger. I just can’t stand when people misplace blame or accolades, It’s just like in Baseball when it’s the coaches fault ’cause they lost. Well maybe it’s the GM’s fault for hiring a bunch of suckjobs, or the players fault for a being a suckjob. Just trying to make people understand that things are rarely done in a vacumn and blame can almost never be absolute. Except for this post. It sucks. Blame me.

  12. Based on Kang’s mask, I’d say he’s going to have to go somewhere else and steal some straws, because spilling lemonade all over your time traveling conqueror suit is a major super villain no-no.

  13. Hello? It’s Amy ‘frickin’ Carter! Doesn’t anyone else besides me remember all those press conferences where she was asked as to why she was raising the price at her lemonade stand? (You know… kind of as a jab at her father’s policy which resulted in the drastic rise in inflation?)

    Oh Sweet Pumpkin Bread! I’m so flippin’ old.


    Okay. Just so people will understand the humor of these panels… if it was written TODAY… Kang would have swung by that nearby hedge and stolen a bottle of tequila from an intoxicated teenager in a slutty dress who slurred after teh fleeing Kang, “Mmmy dad ish so going to invade your *bleepin* planet, douche bag!”

  14. “Hello? It’s Amy ‘frickin’ Carter!”

    NO WAY!!! Is this really Amy Carter, or are you just kidding? I READ one where Spidey ends up chilling in a limo with Amy Carter! I thought it was Spectacular Spider-Man, but it was so long ago, it could certainly have been this.

    Dude, two minutes ago, I thought this was the same old boring Kang vs. Lemonade story, but if that is the one with Amy Carter in a limo, my mind is blown.

  15. Peter’s wearing two layers (plus his Spidey costume) on a day hot enough to sell lemonade on. He’s just mad that Kang beat him to the lemonade.

  16. Dude took the WHOLE PITCHER of lemonade! He’s gonna be using the john inside his time lair in about fifteen minutes. That’s when the Avengers will burst in and defeat him.

  17. SPOILER!

    The issue ends with Amy Carter squirting a lemon in Kang’s face, leading to his defeat.

    Kang: I can’t see you, little squirt!
    Amy Carter: You’re a real lemon, Kang!

    It should also be noted that Peter totally wanted lemonade, but JJJ told him he couldn’t drink on the job. Always being a hypocrite, JJJ helps himself to glass.

    These really are the best comics ever.

    (Oh, and Justin, no letterer was credited.)

  18. “Kang: I can’t see you, little squirt!
    Amy Carter: You’re a real lemon, Kang!”

    Suck it, Kang! Amy Carter pwn5 your time-conquering ass, citrus-style! Smarter than Helen Taft, tougher than Alice Roosevelt, and prettier than Trish Nixon!

  19. I love how Amy there in the first panel, confronted with an ominous-suited supervillan, is all ‘Oh, hi, neighbor! Want some lemonade?”

    …I mean, it’s the Marvel universe. The ‘Don’t Talk to Strangers’ lecture covers an entire frickin’ semester. With credit.

  20. But, on the other hand, if death is less incapacitating than the common cold, some people probably would get a little less worried about things.

  21. Um, off topic question. Are the little choice thingies to the left adds, or what you’re really reading/listening to?
    The new Jarvis Cocker? Really? Should I give it another chance? I was under the impression that it wasn’t, you know, good.
    If they’re advertisements, never mind. Or I was just kidding.

  22. The “Sponsor” section is an ad. The Reading/Watching/Listening stuff is actually stuff that I’m reading, watching, or listening (or at least, that I’ve recently done so or plan to do soon). Technically, they could be considered ads, since if you click on something and buy it, I get a small kickback from Amazon in the form of a gift certificate for shilling it to you. It’s a little more palatable to me than most advertising, since it’s me telling you something I like and giving you the option of purchasing it for yourself.

    Anyway, yeah, I actually really like Jarvis a lot, so I’d certainly recommend giving it another shot. “Running the World,” of course, pretty much makes the CD for me, but overall, I’m very pleased with it.

    Plus he did a great interview on Fresh Air last week.

  23. I wonder if they tried to explain what Kang was in this.

    “That’s KANG! He is a CONQUEROR from the FUTURE who is also from ANCIENT EGYPT where he was a PHARAOH! Actually there might be MORE THAN ONE of him! I’m not entirely CLEAR on the concept myself!”