The Science of Batman, Chapter One

In an effort to better understand the world’s greatest vigilante detective, we here at the ISB Institute for Super-Heroic Studies have sunk a good deal of this year’s research budget into distilling and categorizing the varied elements that comprise his identity.

Tonight, the first of our findings.

 

 

Further information on the subject can be found in Dr. Miller’s 1987 thesis on the subject, as well as the leading online resource.

18 thoughts on “The Science of Batman, Chapter One

  1. shit that’s funny.
    you’ve made groundbreaking steps in the fledgling new science of batmath.

  2. THIS IS THE GREATEST POST IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD.

    WITH A LINK TO THE GREATEST SITE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. Two frames. TWO FRAMES.

    I LOVE YOU CHRIS SIMS.

    I absolutely died laughing and linked it to eight million people with “oh my god oh my god.”

  3. I’ve had quite a DC education tonight. Venn diagram Batman class, and my own time learning about Doiby Dickles. Dude went from cab driver to Green Lantern sidekick to interplanetary monarch in a hurry. And he was beating fools down with a wrench the whole time!

    I really need to read more Golden Age comics.

  4. I used to speak mutant with my sister when we felt the urge to say something in code. One day this girl went by, wearing a dress that looked like nothing less than a frilly curtain someone had taken off a rod and turned into a dress. I said to my sister “Eyes slideways, spud.” After a moment, she remarked “Chegs billy. Chegs preschool mutant.”

    Naturally this means I love the hell out of this post. Need to show it to my sister.

  5. If you love graph-based comedy, definitely check out Indexed:

    indexed.blogspot.com

    If you haven’t seen it already, you should give it a look.

    EvilLuke

  6. I always loved how Frank Miller’s vision of ultimate fascism and its mindless followers was typified by the use of “Frankie Says Relax” style t-shirts. Brown shirts? Naw. Armbands? Nope. Jackboots? Au contraire. Evil = Katharine Hamnett fashion designs.

  7. Bah, I say! Dr. Miller’s work may have been groundbreaking back in 1986 when he findings were first announced, but his best theories were rehashes of the earlier works of Profs. O’Neil and Adams, and his later works have devolved into foolish quackery, such as his recent postulate that:

    Keeping Our Masks On > -(Keeping Our Masks On).

    Rubbish, I say!

    [re-adjusts monocle, puffs pipe.]

  8. Steven,
    You puffed-up jackanape! Dr. Miller may be getting a bit flighty in his dotage, but that doesn’t minimize the wondrous impact he made in his prime! An impact that, i think, should not be spoken of as diminished by his later works. View the theories for what they are, and do not let your opinions of them individually commingle and cloud your judgement.
    For example, his work on the first year of batmath.
    -(utility belt) > utility belt

    [straightens smoking jacket, swirls brandy, looks at stock ticker]

  9. I see one major flaw with this diagram. Shouldn’t there be some Things That Shiv which are also Balls Nasty?

  10. I shall be citing this as evidence in my next scholarly monograph, Vigilante Justice: Is It Balls Nasty Enough?

  11. It all came together when I saw mudhole:operating table.

    This has inspired me to finish my Slash Maurad term paper.