This year for Christmas, my editors at ComicsAlliance decided to give me the present of allowing me to write an article about whatever the heck I wanted, and oh, how foolish they were to do that. Thus, I take my love of Christmas specials and my newfound obsession fascination with Walker, Texas Ranger to bring you a look at the Walker Christmas Episode, in which Santa robs the mall and Chuck Norris delivers a baby.

I’ve talked about Chuck Norris before on the ISB, but those of you who follow me on Twitter know full well how enraptured I am every day from 2 to 4 with the complete insanity of that show, and while the Christmas episode doesn’t come anywhere close to the madness of the Gary Busey episode (which is actually even crazier than it sounds from just calling it “The Gary Busey episode of Walker, Texas Ranger), it’s still pretty wild.

Personally, I like how Alex laments that one day we’ll be sending “emails instead of Christmas cards!” in the cold open. Oh, CBS. You do love your old, old viewers.