BATMAN
October 24, 2009 | Posted by Chris Sims 
, 1991
Categories: Spooktoberfest, The Many Emotions of Batman | 
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14 Comments »
October 24, 2009 | Posted by Chris Sims Sponsor
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October 24, 2009 | Posted by Chris Sims
HEY, ROBIN, THERE’S A SPIDER ON YOUR BACK!
“Did you hear the one about the dreaded Batman, who showed up and kicked your face?”
“Guess what? I’m him, and you’re you.”
“Boo.”
Exit Batman, pursued by a fingerprint.
(Is it Bill Finger’s? Badum-bump!)
“And then the car radio said there was an escaped mental patient out in the woods, so the the girl nervously said ‘Maybe we shouldn’t be here necking at Lover’s Lane.’
‘You’re absolutely right.’ replied the handsome young boy named Wayne Bruce. He pushed her away, slamming down on the gas pedal and putting the car in reverse, making a 180 turn from Lover’s Lane to get onto I-22 to Arkham. He then triggered both of his nitrogen boosters to turn the controlled spin into a-
. . . Robin, get back here, I’m not finished.”
@KDBryan:
God or your personal equivalent bless you.
-the Batman cut a mean figure, at 10 foot 2, looming over the innocent-
and he also has a looooong torso. creepy!
Apparently, Bats has difficulty holding his narrative wad. It’s a common problem, so I’m told.
I just got finished reading the trade trilogy of this, funnily enough.
Gotta love the Kelley Jones Bats!
” . . . and then they said ‘We’ll put Joel Schumacher in charge . . .”
“…and the campers, inept and unaware of the 17 pressure point takedowns that had available to them in that position alone, shrieked in horror as the sociopath bore down on them. He shambled along, clearly telegraphing that his right knee was his weakest point, but none of these helpless imbeciles took advantage of this obvious flaw, instead choosing to run without a strategy into a building with few workable exits….”
“…and then, the most horrible surprise of them all: It was all because of Superboy Prime reality punches and Mr. Mind pooping out history! And some crap with the Miracle Machine and Superman, singing! And there were a dozen Lantern Corps, and they were all different colors! And then… I DIED!”
What are you talking about? I crapped my pants!
“… what was that in the shadows? It was certainly not a ghost, as nobody returns from the ether of death, only the pain remains, the pain of your beloved family ripped from you. The girl realised the shadows were her place now, she waited and thought only of vengeance.”