A Friendly Reminder From Jim Starlin and Dave Cockrum
November 23, 2008 | Posted by Chris Sims
BATMAN IS FUCKING BRUTAL.
Categories: Batman, Friendly Reminders | 
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November 23, 2008 | Posted by Chris Sims Sponsor
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November 23, 2008 | Posted by Chris Sims
That, or creepy. Batman is creepy.
Batman is Fucking Brutal
Batman is Fucking Constipated.
(Personally, I blame Alfred.)
lol.
Glad I found this blog
And then he pulled a car battery out of his utility belt and started to play it like a maestro with the punk as the subject……
true art, indeed….
Aha, the goddamn Batman is brutal! You can’t conceive of the pain he can cause. Brutally. So brutal. It was brutal!
Notice how he did not once use the word “Goddamn”. Take note, Frank Miller.
You kinda get the idea maybe Batman wants that Road Warrior extra to shoot her after a certain point…
Batman is totally metal. I could see him paying for the guys hospital bills and rehabilitation and anonymously just to do it all again once the guy spends like months getting back to functionality.
Brutal.
Why does that punk have the Chevron gas station logo painted on his face? Is that a Gotham gang? Are the gasoline price wars a literal war in Gotham?
Danicus, you missed the facts that he had filed his teeth into spikes and turned his irides red somehow.
This is where Joel Schumacher got the idea for dressings mobs up like black velvet paintings.
Everything is a literal war in Gotham.
Batman isn’t brutal. He’s efficient. He plans all his fight scenes and body snapping epilogues way, way early. Even practises in front of a mirror. Sometimes even on Alfred. Alfred kicks his ass, of course.
Why is that punk threatening Aunt May?
Why is that punk threatening Aunt May?
Because that’s what everybody does?
It’s… Dread Batman Roberts!
“No! To the pain! I’ll explain and I’ll use small words so that you’ll be sure to understand, you warthog-faced buffoon. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose. The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right. Your ears you keep and I’ll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, “Dear God! What is that THING,” will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever. Now, DROP… YOUR… GUN!
With all due respect to Mr. Starlin and Mr. Cockrum, who needed to be reminded?
And that is why Batman doesn’t effing kill anybody, BITCHES.
Batman is metal.
Boneman- And notice how well Batman handles the situation. Spiderman needs to be taking notes. Batman won’t take crap from Aunt May kidnappers.
Makes me wonder if Batman could have just threatened Mephisto into healing Aunt May…
Batman could threaten Mephisto into resurrecting his parents, but he chooses not to.
Think about that.
Batman is so tense. He’s going to ruin his teeth.
Pandering to the juvenile macho power fantasies of the typical comic book reader, I see.
That and the muscular guys in tight outfits wrestling each other – not that there is anything wrong with that.
You say that like this is news.
Goon: “Okay, I surrender.”
Batman: “…and then I’ll pull your intestines out through your ears and stuff them back down your mouth…”
Goon: “No, seriously. Look, I’m putting the gun down.”
Batman: “You will know an eternity of pain and suffering!”
Goon: “Lady, get out of here. Look! No hostage, no gun. I’m surrendering peacefully. Let’s go find a cop.”
Batman: “Yea, verily, even unto your children’s children will there be torture!”
Goon: “How much longer are you going to be telling me about the pain?”
Batman: “About ten more minutes. Sit down and get comfortable, because I think I lost my place. Oh, here we go. Pain! Pain beyond imagining…”
Goon: “Sigh.”
Oh, Batman’s just pissed because he’s been waiting around for Aquaman.
“Why is that punk threatening Aunt May?”
Worry not. No mere mortal can threaten a wielder of the Power Cosmic.
That’s only in Hembeck’s continuity. Or was it ToyFare?
Assistant Editor’s Month.
Batman vs. Aunt May, Herald of Galactus, TOTALLY needs to be a comic. Or a claymation Christmas special. Possibly both…
Does Batman get prep time?
“Batman vs. Aunt May, Herald of Galactus, TOTALLY needs to be a comic. Or a claymation Christmas special. Possibly both…”
Rather see May as the Golden Oldie versus Alfred as the Outsider myself, but to each their own. Perhaps with a Herbie cameo?
I say the punk should cut up the old lady anyway. I think Batman is probably bluffing.
Dave Cockrum was a pretty good artist on Batman.
Chris,
There are times when I’m reading “ISB” that I want to scream “Marry me!!” at the top of my lungs. Then I remember that I’m next-to-engaged and you’re probably hitched and I collapse, sobbing, on my life-sized cardboard “Chris” cutout.
Bless you, sir. Bless the ISB.
I’m too young to get married!
batman is a rich mama’s boy an a bitch. I’m fed up pretending hes cool.
Dave Cockrum was one of my favorite artists on Batman.. it took him a while to as he said “Get the Dirty Harry style” in Batman.. however, It could be Alfred!! More Bran Alfred, MORE BRAN!!