All you really need to know about the new Conan movie in order to decide if you want to see it is that there’s a scene where Conan cuts a dude’s head off, then punches another dude in the face with the severed head.

If, however, you’d like more details, I’ve written up a full review of Conan’s latest adventure, from the insane violence to the mystifying plot. Sadly, it’s not a two-hour film adaptation of Rogues in the House, but maybe they’ll get to that with the sequel. One can always hope.