No Comics Wednesdays are the loneliest Wednesdays of all.
Yes, Labor Day pushed the release of this week’s comics back to today, and since I usually like to let things marinate for a bit before I write up my half-cocked, needlessly angry thoughts about them, it looks like it’s time once again to offer up the Internet’s Most Succinct Comics Reviews!
Tonight, I’ll be sharing thoughts on this week’s releases in exactly one sentence each, though given how I abuse the poor comma, there’s no guarantee that the sentence’ll end where it ought to. Still, it’s a shame that Cry For Justice didn’t come out again, because I’m pretty sure I could’ve knocked that one out in two words.
So here’s what I picked up this week…
…and here’s a bunch of reviews that are shorter than the intro paragraph!
Adventure Comics #2: Not only does the second issue of Adventure bring us an actual Legion story, it’s actually really good, and while I’d prefer it if Geoff Johns hadn’t written another scene where a hero slapped around a helpless prisoner, I’m way more likely to accept it from a bunch of a-hole teenagers than from the guy who’s supposed to be the best space-cop ever.
Amazing Spider-Man #604: The old-school action that Van Lente and Kitson have been throwing into this story has made it great, but J. Jonah Jameson acquiring the intellectual property of the Spider-Slayers by having them categorized as work-for-hire might just make this one of my favorite comics of all time.
Doom Patrol #2: Much like Streets of Gotham, I’m starting to get way more interested in the back-up story than I am in the main one, thanks largely to the fact that one has a plot and characters that I don’t really care about, and the other has Kevin Maguire drawing sexy robots.
G-Man: Cape Crisis #2: Chris Giarrusso’s Crisis is already better than every other Crisis except Final Crisis, and since he’s got three more issues to have Superman fight Vampire Anti-Matter Superman for the fate of all of fiction and not bring back Barry Allen, there’s a good chance that it might end up being better.
Incredible Hercules #134: Between the sweeping, Simonsonian fun of the story, an appearance by the Warriors Three, and Thor in a mini-skirt, the only thing I don’t absolutely love about this comic book is that we didn’t get to see what awesome onomatopoetic sound effects Van Lente and Pak came up with for Herc’s night of passion with Alflyse, which I can only assume would’ve been “SEXERRRRRUP!” or “TAPPADATTAAAS!”
Marvel Adventures Super-Heroes #15: I’ll admit that I’ve always sort of hated Tigra (as both a West Coast Avenger and a furry, she’s got two strikes against her right out of the gate), but every time Paul Tobin writes her saying “Aw sneezes!”, my heart softens just a little bit.
Models Inc #1: And speaking of Paul Tobin, I’ve been looking forward to his revival of Millie the Model and her cast in the Marvel universe, but without the caption boxes to tell us, how the hell are we supposed to know who sent in the designs for their dresses?!
Nomad: Girl Without a World #1: If you ever have reason to doubt that Sean McKeever, the guy who gave us the pure joy that is Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane, is an excellent writer (and to be honest, his run on Teen Titans is probably all the reason you need), then just keep in mind that he wrote a solid, engaging and entertaining story that starred Heroes Reborn Bucky.
Punisher: Frank Castle #74: Holy crap, if #74 costs $4.99, what’s #75 going to cost, four live chickens and a kidney?!
Secret Six #13: In case you were wondering whose side you should take in the great Mark Waid/Gail Simone Twitter Feud of ’09, keep this in mind: Mark Waid created the super-hero theme restaurant, Planet Krypton, while Gail Simone created the super-hero themed strip joint, Superiors.
Unwritten #5: I’m not going to say that Unwritten is Sandman done right because a) I’m not Tom DeFalco, and b) I actually do like Sandman quite a bit, but it’s probably safe to say that as far as stories about stories go, Unwritten is Sandman without its head up its ass.
Classic GI Joe v.5: IDW’s finally gotten up to #50 in their reprints of Marvel’s GI Joe series, and unlike some of their other volumes, the reprint quality in this one is uniformly perfect, so good job!
Gotham Central: Deluxe Edition v.2: If you liked the version of the Joker that was in The Dark Knight (and statistically speaking, you do), then you should buy this one immediately, as “Soft Targets” is not only comparable to the movie in terms of tone, but my single favorite Joker story ever.
And that’s the week! As always, I’ve left a few things out–though I considered trying to cram every Wednesday Comics strip into one sentence, all you really need to know is that Dave Gibbons gave you lions with machine guns because he knows what the people really want–so feel free to leave questions or concerns in the comments section below.