Chris vs. Previews: May, 2007, Round Two

I covered the major publishers in last night’s post, and while I think we can all agree that it was a Herculean effort on my part, that still leaves around four hundred pages of stuff to get through in tonight’s post, including this little gem from page 524:

 

Zounds! A Bomé figure that’s actually fully clothed! What other mysterious wonders lay in wait from the indy publishers and merchandise sections? Find out now!

 


 

Comics & Graphic Novels

 

P.239: Avatar Press, Inc.:
A few weeks back, Warren Ellis sent an email out on the Bad Signal where he offered to answer any three questions that “any comics website” cared to ask about his new retro-futurist mad science wingding, and while I’m pretty sure I’ve missed my opportunity to generate some relatively exclusive content for the ISB, I really should’ve jumped on and asked:

1. Does the K in “Doktor Sleepless” stand for “Kicks People In The Face?”

2. If so, will he kick them with an expert marriage of force, mass, and acceleration that each kick in and of itself will be an experiment of brutality so awesome that we learn new things about the universe from their perfect beauty?

3. Um, do you remember that part in NextWave where Devil Dinosaur tries to drink the champagne, but he can’t? That was awesome.

 

P. 268: Dynamite Entertainment:
Normally, this is where I’d call D.E. out on the fact that they’re soliciting nine comics this month with twenty-eight covers between them, but, well, how can I stay mad at the people who publish Dark Xena? Oh D.E., you are a delight!

P.298: Express Publications:

 

 

Parody Press Comics returns, setting their satirical sights on NBC’s tremendously popular TV show, Heroes! Meet Cheerleader Klair Bendit, Mohinder Night Shalaman, Internet Weathergirl Sniki Sanders, meek office-worker Hewoe Chaka-Khana, and the mixed-up Pastrami Brothers, as they go on a quest to save the world and find out the source of their crazy powers! This hilarious book is offere with two collectible first-issue covers–a “good Hewoes” version and a “bad Hewoes” version–shipped in a 50/50 ratio. Make sure this comic is on your list!

 

That sound you just heard? The deafening silence, shattered by your own choking sobs? That was the death of joy.

 

P.304: Fantagraphics Books:

CRACKED Editor Jay Pinkerton and I have an ongoing debate over whether Michael Kupperman or Evan Dorkin is the funniest man in comics, and while it’s a pretty moot point since they’re both pretty amazing, you can gather your own evidence here with the re-offer of Kupperman’s Tales Designed to Thrizzle #1 and 2. They are fantastic.

 

P.331: Oni Press:

Two years after the first one hit shelves, it looks like we’re finally getting the second installment of Sharknife, and that is awesome. Corey Lewis somehow managed to boil video games and comics down to their purest form (which, as we all know at the ISB is fighting), crammed it into a universe where people have to get jacked up on stimulatnts to follow a game of International Kickball, and made a comic so fun that I’ve been looking forward to the second installment since about fifteen minutes after the first part hit the shelves. So that one’s a given.

What really caught my eye here, though, was Apocalipstix, by Ray Fawkes and the totally awesome Cameron Stewart, which looks to be something along the lines of Josie and the Pussycats meets The Road Warrior. And really, there’s nothing about that sentence that I don’t think is awesome.

 

P.353: Tokyopop:

Let’s be honest here, folks: Despite the fact that I can barely contain my excitement about the new volume of Yotsuba&! solicited back on p.217, I generally skip over the major manga publishers, and except for picking up DramaCon, Steady Beat, and Mail Order Ninja on a lark (and enjoying them), there’s not a lot that I’ve really wanted from Tokyopop in a long while.

Of course, every now and then something catches my eye:

 

 

That, my friends, is a solicitation for a comic where the main character fights everything. Normally, that’d be enough to get me on, but my Previews Order already boasts two hardcovers worth of Jack Kirby and a full notebook page of other stuff, so I’m still on the fence. And that means that for the first time ever, I’m leaving my comics buying habits up to you!

Should I Buy Bombos vs. Everything?
U-DECIDE!

Just leave a vote in the comments, but keep in mind that if I get it, I’m gonna have to write about it.

P.368: Top Shelf Productions:

And now, a glimpse at the thought process that brings you Jeffrey Brown’s The Incredible Change-Bots: “Hey, you know what would make the Transformers better? If they stood around coughing and whining about all the girls they have sex with!”

P.374 – Viper Comics:

Again, I don’t really have a joke for this one, but considering that I love The MiddleMan and yet completely missed the solicitation for v.3 on my first flip-through, I thought I’d point it out for everyone. I mean, c’mon Josh Howard, I know ad space in Previews ain’t cheap, but wasn’t it popular enough to get a better space than the inside corner opposite a full-page ad for some blue dude with a compound bow?
 


 

Apparel

This month, the Apparel section isn’t the non-stop barrel of laughs (or “laffs,” as I like to call them), but mixed in amongst painfully unfunny Clerks II merchandise modeled by Greg From Accounting’s sister and a Batman shirt with a bunch of skulls (which apparently represent all those people that Batman doesn’t kill, or something) comes the funniest thing in the entire catalog:

 

 

“Still celebrates the American spirit.” Just… Just wow.

Also, for those of you who thought the “Jimmy Olsen Must Die!” t-shirt made it look a little too much like Jimmy was peeking out from the wearer’s pants, then allow me to introduce you to a shirt that didn’t bother to think that little problem through at all:

 

 

Never before has Darkseid’s helmet design been so terribly, terribly inappropriate.

 


 

And that is the kind of joke I like to close on. If anything stuck out to you this month, or if you just want to advise me to give Bombos vs. Everything a shot, feel free to leave a comment. Otherwise, I’m gonna try to find a pair of pants that has the lower half of Jimmy Olsen’s face on it.

Uh, I mean… Oh forget it.

44 thoughts on “Chris vs. Previews: May, 2007, Round Two

  1. I dunno about you, but I definitely want everyone to fear my wang’s Omega Effects.

    And what the hell, buy Bombos. You know you want to.

  2. Yeah, buy it, Providing it’s not a matter of that or the rent. If it is a matter of that or the rent, you can always auction it off afterwards to a lucky invincible super-fan.

  3. But will Bombos vs. Everything include bear karate fights?

    You would think that a comic promising to include a fight against everything would do its best to live up to the hyperbole…

  4. I would buy “Bombos”, but it would be better if it were an actual adaption of the video game. I mean, that paperboy had to deal with Death himself and sentient whirlwinds! If that wouldn’t make an entertaining manga, I don’t know what would.

  5. But Chris-no mention of THE MICE FROM mouseguard!! Coming soon? What about the new series?
    Just buy the bomobos thing-you know you’re going to…

  6. I’d buy that Darkseid shirt, but my girlfriend would likely never lay a hand on me again.

  7. It has the words “Vs. Everything” right there in the title.

    What more could you want? The Punisher battling a time tossed Conan the Barbarian on Godzilla’s back while Dum Dum Dugan holds onto his hat comically?

    Because that isn’t happening friend.

  8. My vote for Bombos is only based 50% on the solicitation. The other 50% is the fact that the author/artist is MAXIMO V. LORENZO.

    That name can’t be real, can it?

  9. I am shocked, Chris, that you even have to think about picking up Bombos V Everything. Buy it!

  10. I say thee nay. Mostly just because I prefer to vote for the underdog. And there is just no way in hell you don’t buy a book where a paperboy fights a potato demon…

  11. I say yes, only because the last thing I saw by that guy was a comic called something like POLICE COPS (caps intentional which included the line:
    “Ever seen a man KILL A SUBMARINE?”

    So yeah, I would buy it.

  12. I know what I’m getting my hubby for Father’s day, that shirt ROCKS!

    And my vote is “buy it” How can you resist a story that features a giant potato demon?

  13. I have a friend who’s an editor for Tokyopop, so I have to tell you to vote for it.

    Also it looks awesome.

  14. Forget the potato demon, I just want to see the little punk on the bottom of the cover get punched. Damn punk kids!

    I vote buy it.

  15. I was tempted by that Tokyopop book until I saw the bit in the solicitation about “South Park style humor” which made me think it was probably not at all funny. Nothign against South Park, mind you. Just “South Park style humor”.

  16. You should definitely get Bombos… It’s bombastic!!

    Anyway, if the creator has previously done soemthign in which a man murders a submarine, then I’m sold.

  17. Man, did I murder the word “something” up there or WHAT?

    “Have you ever seen a man KILL A WORD?!?”

  18. Not pants, aprons! Aprons with the bottom half of Darkseid’s and Jimmy’s faces! You can mix and match!!!

  19. “Hmm, I want to buy this Bombos vs Everything, but am way overextended on my budget already.

    I know! I’ll ask my readers if I should buy it, since I know with undoubtable certainty that they will tell me to, thereby diverting any guilt from me for the purchase. I am merely the dutiful servant of my public.

    Plan: Successful!”

  20. BOMBOS makes me nostalgic for that time-honored classic of the kicksplode genre, DESTROY!!! So I give an upvote for it.

    Also, whoever designed that shirt loses 50 points for having the big man peering out of your pants and yet not going with DARKSEID IS.

  21. Buy it. Definitely.

    Also, if you wear that t-shirt inside out, it’ll sorta be like Darkseid is…well…hopefully not using his Omega Beams.

  22. This is totally not what you asked, but on the topic of things from TokyoPop…

    I don’t read a lot of stuff from them either, but King City was totally sweet and awesome and pretty much something I think you would love.

    http://www.tokyopop.com/P-66/

    So buy THAT.

    THEN come back and buy that other one.

  23. I’d buy that but then my girlfriend would never lay a hand on me again…

  24. I think you need to get it, simply so you can tell us whether or not La Bombos does, in fact, fight everything.

    Also: Yotsuba? Really true? When when when?

  25. “Bombos” should be bought. I’ve read part of it and it’s a legend amongst the folks at Tokyopop. The thing has been in production for years and it’s supposed to be the greatest thing since sliced bread. I mean, it’s no “Mail Order Ninja,” but then again, what is?

  26. To paraphrase Joe Dawson, I can’t imagine a world where Chris Sims hasn’t bought Bombos Vs. Everything. The fact is, I don’t want to.

  27. I dunno about Bombos vs Everything. Is it a one-shot? How much does it cost?

    Well, if it helps, here I cut-and-paste a brief description of the series from tokyopop.com:

    “Bombos Versus Everything is about a young boy’s yearn for excitement and traveling the world. He does this by means of bat fighting, the prominent fighting style of the area’s culture. This of course leads him into hardship as his best friend Addy (female) does not want him to leave her. But neither Bombos nor Addy can express their feelings for each other. His rival Veng hates to be outdone by Bombos, and is always two steps behind. Master Quake trains to two rivals so they’ll be prepared when they leave for the big city to test out their skills”.

    BAT FIGHTING!!!!!

  28. I know! I’ll ask my readers if I should buy it, since I know with undoubtable certainty that they will tell me to, thereby diverting any guilt from me for the purchase. I am merely the dutiful servant of my public.

    Plan: Successful!

    Curses! I am found out!

  29. It’s funny that almost the other 99% figures of that anime girl Chris posted at the begining (Saber from Fate/Stay Night) are actually with very few clothing.

  30. Yes, you definately must buy Bombos!

    The creator’s website is http://www.atomictoy.org/ and even updates are only occasional, I still check it every day in hopes of even one small scrap of new comicy goodness. Hell, the Bizmark Ribeye name even comes from his site/comics!

    He has another comic called “The Aggressive Adventures of Fearless Griggs” ( http://www.fearlessgriggs.com/ ) WHich I haven’t had a chance to check out yet, but it looks extremely promising.

  31. If you don’t order the Bombos comic, the terrorists (Kevin Church, et. all) win.

  32. I dunno about that Bombos thing. It says “vrs Everything” but I very much doubt it’ll include everything. I mean, everything covers a lot of ground right? Is he going to be fighting zombie Colonel America? That Darkseid shirt? That anime figurine (which, BTW, must have incredibly long legs)? A submarine?

    Somehow I doubt it. Which means you’re gonna be pretty disappointed when you read it expecting everything…

    …Oh bugger it. I say buy it. I just wanna read your review! And it’s your money. :)

  33. At first I thought that whole Bombos thing looked a little derivative of Scott Pilgrim, but if its really been in production for years, who knows. So, I dunno, I guess you should order it. Gamble a stamp!

  34. Just so’s you don’t feel too pressured, don’t buy Bombos. Buy someone a nice cake instead.

    Actually, as it will no doubt bring you much joy and happiness, I think you should buy Bombos if you want it. Life is short and generally a pain in the Darkseid, so have fun while it’s offered. You fall short on rent, give me a holler. I can spot you a twenty or something.

  35. Hey! I’m Maximo, I’m not sure if you should by my book or not…But I can answer some things…

    1. Bombos was created by Andy Helms, I pretty much did the art and finished the story.

    2. My name REALLY is Maximo V. Lorenzo, and I do enjoy my name on a daily basis.

    3. Bombos dosn’t get to fight EVERYTHING. He WILL get to fight everything, but there’s only so much can happen in one book.

    4. The book has a part 2 and 3 in the works. No promises of what’ll happen.

    5. Not southpark style humor, but there is shit talking. What battle is complete without shit talking?

    6. I liked the story enough to work on it for a year so….You might like it too?

    7. If you want to know what to expect the description posted sums it up pretty nicely.

    Annnndd…yeah I hope that helps. If you do get it, tell me what you think and Ill keep all critisism in mind for book 2.